Siffrin...? (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
loopsiedaisy) wrote2028-08-07 10:29 pm
loopsiedaisy) wrote2028-08-07 10:29 pm
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victory_road app?? [spoilers]
Player
Name: Terry
E-mail: n/a
Preferred Contact:![[plurk.com profile]](https://plurk.com/favicon.ico)
stocke, or PM journal!
Timezone: EST
Current Characters in Victory Road: None!
Character
Name: Loop
Series: In Stars and Time
Timeline: After Secret Boss
Canon Resource Links: The wiki isn't... fully filled out so I'm providing the most relevant context. But here are links too: overall story (incomplete), Siffrin, Loop. The prologue game is also canonically confirmed to be Loop's but it doesn't really give you any more info.
Once upon a time a silly little rogue guy (Siffrin) got stuck in a time loop while he and his friends were trying to save the country from an evil king. Only he retained his memory between loops... well, him and the weird, sometimes annoying, star-shaped Tutorial Guy TM.
Initially Siffrin thought this was a blessing, because otherwise he and his party would all just have... died. Repeatedly. But then the loops didn't end when they beat the king. It helped to bounce ideas off the Tutorial Guy, but after like 20+ rounds of the same two days over and over he started spiraling... aaaand it only got worse from there, as he slowly ran out of plans for escape.
Eventually it turned out the loops were (partially) caused by him not talking to his friends about how he loves them, wants reassurance that they feel the same way, and wants to keep traveling with them after their Quest TM. Important lessons were learned about communication and friendship, and everyone lived happily ever after.
This, however, isn't the story of that little guy!
This is the story of a previous version of that little guy, who had the same thing happen to them, but never had a helpful tutorial star to help keep them going - and was stuck for much longer than the Siffrin we know. Eventually, completely isolated with no one else to talk to, or at least no one who wouldn't forget by next loop, they simply... couldn't handle it anymore. In utter despair, they stopped trying to escape the loops and just wished for help, and to have it be over.
Wish magic granted that wish by sticking them into the role of providing the help for another Siffrin as the Tutorial Guy. This other Siffrin was the one who actually succeeded and got to keep their happy ending... unlike "Loop". Unfortunate!
The only other important note is that Siffrin(/Loop) comes from an island country that got wiped from everyone's memory. People are generally aware that this happened due to written records, but are incapable of remembering details, and are prone to forgetting about it when they're not actively focusing. Trying to say the country's name or read the country's language leaves people with severe headaches.
It's left ambiguous what happened to the people who were still present there when it happened. For Siffrin, a kid who'd run away from home with his family's boat at the time, it basically wiped everything - his memory of his entire life to that point, his language, even his original name. He still remembers some stuff unconsciously, but his brain is just made of swiss cheese now, with him only aware some of the time why. It's bad enough that it affects his present-day memory as well; he's very forgetful. It's fine, everything's fine!
Personality:
[Note: in game, Siffrin uses "he/they" pronouns, while Loop uses just "they." The developer has said that Loop is comfortable with both and gave just the one pronoun mostly to hide their identity... but also a little bit because The Time Loop Horrors ate their he/hims. In rp I might decide to use both eventually, but for clarity below I try to stick to "they" for Loop, and "he" for Siffrin. (Whether it's current-Siffrin or shared stuff from before the two diverged.)]
[slaps silly wizard hat] this bad boy can fit so much self-destructive behavior in there
So. For Loop, you have to start with Siffrin(s) generally, since that's still who they are underneath.
Siffrin is outwardly a cheerful jokester with a laid-back, mysterious vibe. And that description... is mostly right! He really is a lover of terrible jokes, to the point that he names his battle skills with puns, and he really does derive a lot of joy from making friends laugh, teasing them, and cheering them up. He really is pretty easygoing when not in late stage time loop depression, though admittedly it's partially an "I'm happy doing whatever makes my friends happy" thing... and partially an "I will never admit that I do have a problem with something when I'm not joking, because that might make people upset and that would be bad!!!" thing. His friends describe him as a good listener, and generally sympathetic and eager to help out, if not necessarily good at advice.
But he isn't mysterious so much as terminally incapable of talking about himself. He desperately avoids "burdening" people with his problems, or asking for most things he wants... even things like "a hug". Despite his joking personality, Siffrin's pretty introverted and likes just sorta being Present in conversations and hangouts, which makes it worse; it's hard to tell if he's being normal-quiet or if he's Not Talking About Something. And that leads into...
Internally, Siffrin is anxious, self-deprecating, and prone to catastrophizing minor mistakes - or even stuff that honestly isn't really his fault! When in a good state of mind, he's capable of moving on from short bouts of beating himself up without truly spiraling. ...though this comes with a side-helping of avoiding stuff that he really shouldn't be, even if it's upsetting. (Quote: "I just try not to think about things that bother me in general, haha.") In a bad state of mind, he escalates to constant self-loathing, flip-flopping between manic behavior and depression. He also bottles. Like, he really bottles - in the time loops, it takes current-Siffrin longer to lash out at his friends than it does for him to start thinking of them as NPCs with scripted dialogue, which is the point when he's already doing extremely badly.For reference in my playthrough it took over 70 loops,
Siffrin's primary motivation, always, is loneliness. It's implied that after losing his country but prior to meeting his party in the game, Siffrin was perpetually an outsider, never forming a lasting human bond. (Or maybe he did and then forgot because of swiss cheese brain, which is even more terrifying to him!) The dread of losing his first relationships since... ever.... is part of what causes the events of canon; subconsciously, Siffrin would rather be stuck in the same 2 days forever than be separated from his friends. He deeply fears forgetting someone important, or being forgotten, but (until after canon) he's convinced both those things are inevitable for him. Oh... and he's also unused to touch and extremely jumpy, but simultaneously desperately touch-starved.
Wow, that's a lot! What about Loop-Siffrin then?
Loop once says to current-Siffrin, "I actually manufactured this personality especially to get on your nerves." It's played off as a joke, but Loop says a lot of stuff that's played off as a joke and then ends up being meaningful! And they do initially come off chatty and arrogant, sometimes catty or snarky, and cheerfully flirty without any real intent behind it. They're more willing to be openly abrasive, though much of that is due to talking to a copy of themself (see: self-loathing). Many moments they laugh at Siffrin or sound the meanest are, in retrospect, the moments where they're remembering making the same decisions.
But that personality is very definitely deliberate rather than natural. The more Loop doesn't want to talk about something, and often the angrier they get, the more those behaviors intensify. Even then, their cattiness is pretty on point to the kinds of things Siffrin sometimes thinks but doesn't usually say (...except back to Loop). Conversely, when Loop is truly concerned about Siffrin, or is speaking honestly about something they have in common, the act vanishes and they abruptly become serious or thoughtful.
When their identity is revealed, a lot of those adopted mannerisms remain while they explode at Siffrin, but they also stop hiding that they harbor the same self-loathing he does. It's basically just become a more theatrical version of how Siffrin smiles when he's lashing out.
Loop does seem to be a bit more self-aware about their (collectively, both Loop's and Siffrin's) flaws than Siffrin is - if only because of getting to see themselves from the outside and having a bunch of time to think. But... while they're very willing to call that out with Siffrin, they're susceptible to the same exact problems.
Loop is also just as motivated by loneliness. Over the course of the game, they get very attached to Siffrin despite having no intention to - both of them have no one else who understands their experience. Loop provides comfort and touch when they see Siffrin dissociating, and admits to being genuinely grateful for his company. That comes into direct conflict with their jealousy when Siffrin is able to escape the loops and keep his friends. Loop is the secret final boss of the game, claiming they're going to kill Siffrin to replace him - but even if you lose, they're not able to bring themselves to do it, breaking down in tears instead. And during the game, the things that hurt them most are: a. being looked at like a stranger when they do finally interact with Siffrin's party, and b. the loop where Siffrin's party calls him family. (That scene is legit just. All the game meta text updates to call them "family members" rather than "allies" from then on, Loop teases Siffrin about it like "haha that's awkward", Siffrin goes "YOU'RE awkward," and Loop just SHUTS UP AND LOOKS AWAY...)
Away from canon, I interpret Loop as likely to act a lot more like original Siffrin and less like their constructed "Loop" persona; they no longer have a Siffrin to deceive, and that behavior was extremely targeted. But that doesn't mean they won't fall back on it out of habit when pissed off or trying to hide something (or if they ever see Siffrin, specifically). More generally, they're still holding on to a lot of anger, jealousy, depression, and isolation. They did end on a good note with current-Siffrin, but they never had the closure of escaping the loops or even just... talking to their friends one more time and being recognized as "Siffrin". This means they're gonna be a hot mess of probably like, their emotion bottling capacity is already at 80% full at all times,
Pokémon Information
Affiliation: Breeder! Being surrounded by baby Pokemon is free therapy right
Starter: Beldum
Password: Atomic Fireball
Samples
RP Sample: top level on Heckin TDM
Victory Road Sample: top level on VR TDM
Name: Terry
E-mail: n/a
Preferred Contact:
Timezone: EST
Current Characters in Victory Road: None!
Character
Name: Loop
Series: In Stars and Time
Timeline: After Secret Boss
Canon Resource Links: The wiki isn't... fully filled out so I'm providing the most relevant context. But here are links too: overall story (incomplete), Siffrin, Loop. The prologue game is also canonically confirmed to be Loop's but it doesn't really give you any more info.
Once upon a time a silly little rogue guy (Siffrin) got stuck in a time loop while he and his friends were trying to save the country from an evil king. Only he retained his memory between loops... well, him and the weird, sometimes annoying, star-shaped Tutorial Guy TM.
Initially Siffrin thought this was a blessing, because otherwise he and his party would all just have... died. Repeatedly. But then the loops didn't end when they beat the king. It helped to bounce ideas off the Tutorial Guy, but after like 20+ rounds of the same two days over and over he started spiraling... aaaand it only got worse from there, as he slowly ran out of plans for escape.
Eventually it turned out the loops were (partially) caused by him not talking to his friends about how he loves them, wants reassurance that they feel the same way, and wants to keep traveling with them after their Quest TM. Important lessons were learned about communication and friendship, and everyone lived happily ever after.
This, however, isn't the story of that little guy!
This is the story of a previous version of that little guy, who had the same thing happen to them, but never had a helpful tutorial star to help keep them going - and was stuck for much longer than the Siffrin we know. Eventually, completely isolated with no one else to talk to, or at least no one who wouldn't forget by next loop, they simply... couldn't handle it anymore. In utter despair, they stopped trying to escape the loops and just wished for help, and to have it be over.
Wish magic granted that wish by sticking them into the role of providing the help for another Siffrin as the Tutorial Guy. This other Siffrin was the one who actually succeeded and got to keep their happy ending... unlike "Loop". Unfortunate!
The only other important note is that Siffrin(/Loop) comes from an island country that got wiped from everyone's memory. People are generally aware that this happened due to written records, but are incapable of remembering details, and are prone to forgetting about it when they're not actively focusing. Trying to say the country's name or read the country's language leaves people with severe headaches.
It's left ambiguous what happened to the people who were still present there when it happened. For Siffrin, a kid who'd run away from home with his family's boat at the time, it basically wiped everything - his memory of his entire life to that point, his language, even his original name. He still remembers some stuff unconsciously, but his brain is just made of swiss cheese now, with him only aware some of the time why. It's bad enough that it affects his present-day memory as well; he's very forgetful. It's fine, everything's fine!
Personality:
[Note: in game, Siffrin uses "he/they" pronouns, while Loop uses just "they." The developer has said that Loop is comfortable with both and gave just the one pronoun mostly to hide their identity... but also a little bit because The Time Loop Horrors ate their he/hims. In rp I might decide to use both eventually, but for clarity below I try to stick to "they" for Loop, and "he" for Siffrin. (Whether it's current-Siffrin or shared stuff from before the two diverged.)]
[slaps silly wizard hat] this bad boy can fit so much self-destructive behavior in there
So. For Loop, you have to start with Siffrin(s) generally, since that's still who they are underneath.
Siffrin is outwardly a cheerful jokester with a laid-back, mysterious vibe. And that description... is mostly right! He really is a lover of terrible jokes, to the point that he names his battle skills with puns, and he really does derive a lot of joy from making friends laugh, teasing them, and cheering them up. He really is pretty easygoing when not in late stage time loop depression, though admittedly it's partially an "I'm happy doing whatever makes my friends happy" thing... and partially an "I will never admit that I do have a problem with something when I'm not joking, because that might make people upset and that would be bad!!!" thing. His friends describe him as a good listener, and generally sympathetic and eager to help out, if not necessarily good at advice.
But he isn't mysterious so much as terminally incapable of talking about himself. He desperately avoids "burdening" people with his problems, or asking for most things he wants... even things like "a hug". Despite his joking personality, Siffrin's pretty introverted and likes just sorta being Present in conversations and hangouts, which makes it worse; it's hard to tell if he's being normal-quiet or if he's Not Talking About Something. And that leads into...
Internally, Siffrin is anxious, self-deprecating, and prone to catastrophizing minor mistakes - or even stuff that honestly isn't really his fault! When in a good state of mind, he's capable of moving on from short bouts of beating himself up without truly spiraling. ...though this comes with a side-helping of avoiding stuff that he really shouldn't be, even if it's upsetting. (Quote: "I just try not to think about things that bother me in general, haha.") In a bad state of mind, he escalates to constant self-loathing, flip-flopping between manic behavior and depression. He also bottles. Like, he really bottles - in the time loops, it takes current-Siffrin longer to lash out at his friends than it does for him to start thinking of them as NPCs with scripted dialogue, which is the point when he's already doing extremely badly.
Siffrin's primary motivation, always, is loneliness. It's implied that after losing his country but prior to meeting his party in the game, Siffrin was perpetually an outsider, never forming a lasting human bond. (Or maybe he did and then forgot because of swiss cheese brain, which is even more terrifying to him!) The dread of losing his first relationships since... ever.... is part of what causes the events of canon; subconsciously, Siffrin would rather be stuck in the same 2 days forever than be separated from his friends. He deeply fears forgetting someone important, or being forgotten, but (until after canon) he's convinced both those things are inevitable for him. Oh... and he's also unused to touch and extremely jumpy, but simultaneously desperately touch-starved.
Wow, that's a lot! What about Loop-Siffrin then?
Loop once says to current-Siffrin, "I actually manufactured this personality especially to get on your nerves." It's played off as a joke, but Loop says a lot of stuff that's played off as a joke and then ends up being meaningful! And they do initially come off chatty and arrogant, sometimes catty or snarky, and cheerfully flirty without any real intent behind it. They're more willing to be openly abrasive, though much of that is due to talking to a copy of themself (see: self-loathing). Many moments they laugh at Siffrin or sound the meanest are, in retrospect, the moments where they're remembering making the same decisions.
But that personality is very definitely deliberate rather than natural. The more Loop doesn't want to talk about something, and often the angrier they get, the more those behaviors intensify. Even then, their cattiness is pretty on point to the kinds of things Siffrin sometimes thinks but doesn't usually say (...except back to Loop). Conversely, when Loop is truly concerned about Siffrin, or is speaking honestly about something they have in common, the act vanishes and they abruptly become serious or thoughtful.
When their identity is revealed, a lot of those adopted mannerisms remain while they explode at Siffrin, but they also stop hiding that they harbor the same self-loathing he does. It's basically just become a more theatrical version of how Siffrin smiles when he's lashing out.
Loop does seem to be a bit more self-aware about their (collectively, both Loop's and Siffrin's) flaws than Siffrin is - if only because of getting to see themselves from the outside and having a bunch of time to think. But... while they're very willing to call that out with Siffrin, they're susceptible to the same exact problems.
Loop is also just as motivated by loneliness. Over the course of the game, they get very attached to Siffrin despite having no intention to - both of them have no one else who understands their experience. Loop provides comfort and touch when they see Siffrin dissociating, and admits to being genuinely grateful for his company. That comes into direct conflict with their jealousy when Siffrin is able to escape the loops and keep his friends. Loop is the secret final boss of the game, claiming they're going to kill Siffrin to replace him - but even if you lose, they're not able to bring themselves to do it, breaking down in tears instead. And during the game, the things that hurt them most are: a. being looked at like a stranger when they do finally interact with Siffrin's party, and b. the loop where Siffrin's party calls him family. (That scene is legit just. All the game meta text updates to call them "family members" rather than "allies" from then on, Loop teases Siffrin about it like "haha that's awkward", Siffrin goes "YOU'RE awkward," and Loop just SHUTS UP AND LOOKS AWAY...)
Away from canon, I interpret Loop as likely to act a lot more like original Siffrin and less like their constructed "Loop" persona; they no longer have a Siffrin to deceive, and that behavior was extremely targeted. But that doesn't mean they won't fall back on it out of habit when pissed off or trying to hide something (or if they ever see Siffrin, specifically). More generally, they're still holding on to a lot of anger, jealousy, depression, and isolation. They did end on a good note with current-Siffrin, but they never had the closure of escaping the loops or even just... talking to their friends one more time and being recognized as "Siffrin". This means they're gonna be a hot mess of probably like, their emotion bottling capacity is already at 80% full at all times,
Pokémon Information
Affiliation: Breeder! Being surrounded by baby Pokemon is free therapy right
Starter: Beldum
Password: Atomic Fireball
Samples
RP Sample: top level on Heckin TDM
Victory Road Sample: top level on VR TDM